Due to my recent state of confusion that has come as a result of mixed signals, over-analyzation and just general bsing, I am feeling quite compelled to enlighten my readers on what I will refer to as 'romantic imagination.' And just for the record, I came up with that term on the spot so if anyone has anything that they think fits this blog after reading it, please let me know and I can change it.
After reading my last blog you are probably thinking that I actually stumbled upon a decent guy. Seemed nice, interesting, interested in me, complimentary and we appeared to have everything under the sun in common. How then do you explain the immediate fast-forward to 'let's just be friends.' Sounds confusing, huh? I think I can disect this at least a little bit for you all and then I'd like to know what you think.
What if said person is pretty set on knowing exactly what he is looking for and is solely relying on getting that 'feeling' when he is around his apparent future soulmate? Is this how people are defining relationships nowadays? By the presence of that oogling feeling we all refer to as 'butterflies' or lack there of as the case may be with yours truly? Seems a bit presumptuous, doesn't it? Here's the thing with that approach - what happens if you just take a step out of never never land for a second and think that it is in fact possible to have legitimate, long-term feelings for someone that do not result in butterflies. Aren't butterflies somewhat of a sign of fear that what you're feeling might go away some day? Anxiety that the person you're feeling this way for doesn't feel that way for you? Nervous that you might say something that will throw the other person off their horse? And then it could absolutely be a sign of interest, compatibility and eventual love (heaven forbid). But why put all of your eggs in one basket?
I for one have spent the past year plus of my life truly enjoying myself and while I don't think I needed to spend that time 'figuring out who I was' I have come to some conclusions. While other people might be extremely interested in the whole 'mind game' bit that accompanies dating, relationships and so on, I just can't be bothered. For me, an ideal relationship is one that allows both parties involved to be themselves - completely - and enjoy each other's company at the same time. End of story. I really feel like it's that easy. If you have managed to attain that which I cannot seem to get a hold of but will continue to glide through life as the happy go-lucky, karaoke fanatic that I am - then for that I envy you.
Of course I hope everyone reaches this point in their lives, but after this situation I can only think of one thing to say: Try not to rely on one 'feeling' that will allow you to fall into a relationship...or love if that's how it works out. I would suggest just doing what makes you happy - because if it's right then that will make the other person equally as happy.
Cheers.
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I agree with you 100% and I still say "f" him. Delete him from facebook. Keep looking, he's out there.
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