Every day people spend time analyzing the differences between men and women. When you really think about how much time we all spend trying to figure out why he took what I said the way that he did or why she reacted the way that she did - all to find out that nothing was wrong in the first place. That's what I'd like to call - over-analyzing. It's f'n exhausting.
That of course is not the purpose for this blog. Today at work a very young, enlightened mind said to me, "We decided today that men are much more sensitive than women and women are emotional." My response was - I will write my blog about that tonight and here I am.
I'm very interested in this concept because I feel like it couldn't be more on point. Generally when people hear words like emotional and sensitive - there is almost always an assumption that the person/people in question are women. Which makes sense - women generally express themselves more regularly, have unnecessary emotional outbursts that could probably be avoided with a hint of self confidence or trust for that matter. It is for that exact reason that I am confident saying that women, more often than not, let their emotions get the best of them.
Men on the other hand, have a little something stronger that tends to get in their way and that is their ego. I firmly believe that most men (sorry for the blanket statement) let their egos get in their way more often than not- rather than just admitting to a whole slew of things - being wrong, trying to get their way when it's really no big deal, doing something they don't want to do - necessary - and putting up a bit of a fight to try to get their way...all of these things are what drive everyone crazy - including the guy who is involved in the conversation. And I truly believe that a negative effect of the male ego is extreme sensitivity. They don't want to be wrong. They don't want to be told what to do - whereas most girls would rather be told what to do - or at least that seems to be what people think. I say this with absolutely no success stories on dating, on guys or on anything I guess so I'm talking right out of my ass.
I do find that if you are truthful with a guy and it is something that he see's as an insult, a personality flaw or a stereotype - he is not going to be happy with you. And that right there is sensitivity. Sensitive to certain topics - maybe that's a better way to put it. The point is - more often than not - if you say something to a man that can, in some way, be taken as an negative characteristic that he might have - this is not going to be received very well - UNLESS - this man in question is magically willing to understand the fact that we should all be working hard to better ourselves on a daily basis. While that may come across as an incredibly lame statement - I'd say now, more than ever, that's something that I'm sticking to - so please go ahead and deal with the lameness.
So what do we think of these generalizations? Am I crazy...or just absolutely right?
I'd love to hear what you think - as always.
Have a good one..
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
This Brings Me to Online Dating...
I don't know what it is lately with the blog...but I just am not making time to write down anything that goes on in my crazy mind every day. Not sure if it's been too much going on to pinpoint things to actually write about or something that I just can't think of all together.. but I'm gonna write something and hopefully it's interesting if nothing else.
If you remember back in the day when I started Blindfolded it was because I had been on what is still the worst date I have ever been on. Well believe it or not I am STILL SINGLE and have taken the apparently inevitable leap into online dating and do you want to know what it has taught me so far - maybe I'm not ready for dating. Here's the thing with online dating - it's completely superficial which is 100% the opposite of my personality. I mean just the other day I got up the balls to send my first 'inmail' on eHarmony and do you want to know what happened???? I got an email saying that so and so had 'declined' my request to communicate. HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW ME and I'm still being rejected. Christ! If that's not a blow to the self esteem I don't know what is...oh wait.. I can think of plenty of things that are a blow to the self esteem but I'm not that angry or bitter to go there.
But seriously - sure people can read your profiles and really get to know how good of a bullshitter.. I mean person you are - but how honest are people being? If you want my honest opinion - eHarmony...you are sending me nothing but slop. No offense. That could very well be what these people think of me but I'm just not convinced that this is for me. I feel like every inch of my heart and soul has faith that there is still hope in meeting someone the old fashioned way.. at random, through a friend, never through a family member...you know.. the old fashioned way. And you know what - that's bound to work out sooner or later.
I'm not sure what the pressure is all about to start dating someone - or maybe just date in general - but what I'm doing right now is a hell of a lot of 'hanging out.' My mother will certainly attest to that. I'm never home and that brings me to another realization - maybe I'm not at a point where I want to be dating.. or proactively thinking about dating. Because if I was- I probably wouldn't be going out every night and not logging into my different accounts to see what guy with a bizarre username thinks of me. It's all so strange still.
And so the point of this post is the following - if you are not at a point where you are ready to invest beyond emotionally ...but invest your time...into online dating...it isn't worth your time or money. Ultimately everything is about timing anyway so it's either going to work out like this - you'll meet someone when the time is right or you'll be at a point in time in your life when you have the time to find someone.
I'm thinking I still need some me time.. but we'll see how that works out.
Happy hunting!
If you remember back in the day when I started Blindfolded it was because I had been on what is still the worst date I have ever been on. Well believe it or not I am STILL SINGLE and have taken the apparently inevitable leap into online dating and do you want to know what it has taught me so far - maybe I'm not ready for dating. Here's the thing with online dating - it's completely superficial which is 100% the opposite of my personality. I mean just the other day I got up the balls to send my first 'inmail' on eHarmony and do you want to know what happened???? I got an email saying that so and so had 'declined' my request to communicate. HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW ME and I'm still being rejected. Christ! If that's not a blow to the self esteem I don't know what is...oh wait.. I can think of plenty of things that are a blow to the self esteem but I'm not that angry or bitter to go there.
But seriously - sure people can read your profiles and really get to know how good of a bullshitter.. I mean person you are - but how honest are people being? If you want my honest opinion - eHarmony...you are sending me nothing but slop. No offense. That could very well be what these people think of me but I'm just not convinced that this is for me. I feel like every inch of my heart and soul has faith that there is still hope in meeting someone the old fashioned way.. at random, through a friend, never through a family member...you know.. the old fashioned way. And you know what - that's bound to work out sooner or later.
I'm not sure what the pressure is all about to start dating someone - or maybe just date in general - but what I'm doing right now is a hell of a lot of 'hanging out.' My mother will certainly attest to that. I'm never home and that brings me to another realization - maybe I'm not at a point where I want to be dating.. or proactively thinking about dating. Because if I was- I probably wouldn't be going out every night and not logging into my different accounts to see what guy with a bizarre username thinks of me. It's all so strange still.
And so the point of this post is the following - if you are not at a point where you are ready to invest beyond emotionally ...but invest your time...into online dating...it isn't worth your time or money. Ultimately everything is about timing anyway so it's either going to work out like this - you'll meet someone when the time is right or you'll be at a point in time in your life when you have the time to find someone.
I'm thinking I still need some me time.. but we'll see how that works out.
Happy hunting!
Thursday, October 7, 2010
And Here's to Papa John
It's safe to say that losing a loved one is one of the most difficult and emotionally trying events that any individual has to go through. On top of that - depending on your personal affiliation with that person - you very often think about how others are going to react to the same loss - just from a different point of view. I think this is something that we all struggle with on a regular basis - not the sheer act of losing someone but rather interpreting how another person - probably another friend or family member - is going to react to the situation and determine from there any next steps or precautions in the name of mourning.
This was the exact situation that me and my close to 20 very best friends have been faced with over the course of this past week. Coming off of the marriage of two of the greatest people I have ever known - we were all confronted with the very sad news that my great friend John's father, Mr. Stapleton, had passed away. All of this news in the midst of spending a week on the same said friends' honeymoon in the Bahamas...aboard the Carnival Pride.
You can imagine our immediate disbelief in the situation when John shared the news; however, the tonality in his voice was one that his father would have been extremely proud of and I will not be the first or the last to tell him that.
Mr. Stapleton was quite possibly one of the most honest, fun-loving, caring, diplomatic and just genuinely happy people I have ever met. Having a son who just happened to have more than 10 best friends that had to be around at all times was probably not the ideal situation for any parent - which eventually lead to the infamous...'Get to the back of the line you little...' - anyone who needs to know the ending there will....and that's fine. The point is - we are all so very lucky - eternally lucky to have had the opportunity to be a part of Mr. Stapleton's life and for that I am forever grateful.
I don't know that there is another person who I think of and the first thing that comes to mind is the shiniest face, the puffy cheeks and the kind of smile you can only wish to see on your father's, your husband's, your dad's, your brother's, your nephew's, your cousin's or your very best friend's face on a regular basis. But that was him. If he was there - good times were to be had and that is honestly the best way to summarize Mr. Stapleton.
And with that, I leave you - Papa John - with a little note:
There are not many people who come through my life - outside of my friends that I've had forever it seems at this point - who I can say have made me the type of better person, more confident person that I strive to be every day. And you did. You were always so proud of all of us and happy to have us around because you knew we were just genuinely good kids and I will love you forever for that. Thank you for being exactly the way you are. You will be terribly missed.
Rest in peace, Mr. Stapleton.
With nothing but love,
Erin
This was the exact situation that me and my close to 20 very best friends have been faced with over the course of this past week. Coming off of the marriage of two of the greatest people I have ever known - we were all confronted with the very sad news that my great friend John's father, Mr. Stapleton, had passed away. All of this news in the midst of spending a week on the same said friends' honeymoon in the Bahamas...aboard the Carnival Pride.
You can imagine our immediate disbelief in the situation when John shared the news; however, the tonality in his voice was one that his father would have been extremely proud of and I will not be the first or the last to tell him that.
Mr. Stapleton was quite possibly one of the most honest, fun-loving, caring, diplomatic and just genuinely happy people I have ever met. Having a son who just happened to have more than 10 best friends that had to be around at all times was probably not the ideal situation for any parent - which eventually lead to the infamous...'Get to the back of the line you little...' - anyone who needs to know the ending there will....and that's fine. The point is - we are all so very lucky - eternally lucky to have had the opportunity to be a part of Mr. Stapleton's life and for that I am forever grateful.
I don't know that there is another person who I think of and the first thing that comes to mind is the shiniest face, the puffy cheeks and the kind of smile you can only wish to see on your father's, your husband's, your dad's, your brother's, your nephew's, your cousin's or your very best friend's face on a regular basis. But that was him. If he was there - good times were to be had and that is honestly the best way to summarize Mr. Stapleton.
And with that, I leave you - Papa John - with a little note:
There are not many people who come through my life - outside of my friends that I've had forever it seems at this point - who I can say have made me the type of better person, more confident person that I strive to be every day. And you did. You were always so proud of all of us and happy to have us around because you knew we were just genuinely good kids and I will love you forever for that. Thank you for being exactly the way you are. You will be terribly missed.
Rest in peace, Mr. Stapleton.
With nothing but love,
Erin
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Quite the Morning
It's amazing how an ordinary 50 mile commute can be completely altered with a simple text that says nothing but 'Hi.' Hi - two letters and the entire day transforms from a nice little Thursday to - good lord - where is this going? And sure enough it went to a place that I never would have imagined.
Without wasting anyone's time here - this was a former boyfriend - no names of course. This is Blindfolded after all. Haven't really talked to him much since things ended a few years ago - but no hard feelings what so ever. Seemingly he has been doing just fine without me. I think I saw/heard that he has dated a couple of girls in the meantime - nothing serious. God forbid. Anyway - I digress.
After the random 'Hi' - I simply respond by asking what's up and he says that he has a question to ask me later. Oh good - so you're not going to ask me now so that I don't have think about this for any longer than I have and at this point it's only been maybe 5 minutes. And sure enough - he held out for almost two hours before asking me two questions:
1- do I know anyone at work who might be interested in renting out his condo? And 2 - are we at a point where if we were both single - could we have some non-committal 'hey nanny nanny.'
Wow. Happy Thursday Erin. Sometimes I write things out and I wish I was making them up - but I'm not. This is the nonsense that happens to me. And it's always feast or famine. I'll go months with nothing but long nights of crazy dancing and little sleep to people coming out of the wood work telling me they want to hang out and 'catch up.' How on earth can a girl figure ANYTHING OUT when she keeps getting curve balls thrown at her???
Here's the answer. Always say no to the ex. Unless there is a good reason to hang out with him/her - which there rarely is - no reason to do it. And who just comes out and asks someone to do that anyway? Can we talk about that for a second?
I honestly look forward to feedback on this - whatever you can give me. I'm very interested in hearing what all of my loyal readers have to say.
Goodnight now.
Without wasting anyone's time here - this was a former boyfriend - no names of course. This is Blindfolded after all. Haven't really talked to him much since things ended a few years ago - but no hard feelings what so ever. Seemingly he has been doing just fine without me. I think I saw/heard that he has dated a couple of girls in the meantime - nothing serious. God forbid. Anyway - I digress.
After the random 'Hi' - I simply respond by asking what's up and he says that he has a question to ask me later. Oh good - so you're not going to ask me now so that I don't have think about this for any longer than I have and at this point it's only been maybe 5 minutes. And sure enough - he held out for almost two hours before asking me two questions:
1- do I know anyone at work who might be interested in renting out his condo? And 2 - are we at a point where if we were both single - could we have some non-committal 'hey nanny nanny.'
Wow. Happy Thursday Erin. Sometimes I write things out and I wish I was making them up - but I'm not. This is the nonsense that happens to me. And it's always feast or famine. I'll go months with nothing but long nights of crazy dancing and little sleep to people coming out of the wood work telling me they want to hang out and 'catch up.' How on earth can a girl figure ANYTHING OUT when she keeps getting curve balls thrown at her???
Here's the answer. Always say no to the ex. Unless there is a good reason to hang out with him/her - which there rarely is - no reason to do it. And who just comes out and asks someone to do that anyway? Can we talk about that for a second?
I honestly look forward to feedback on this - whatever you can give me. I'm very interested in hearing what all of my loyal readers have to say.
Goodnight now.
Monday, July 26, 2010
There's Awkward and then There's Dating
Of course I've written about something like this before, but believe it or not I have been writing this here blog for more than a year now and it seems that some things never change. It has come time again to slowly dive back into the dating world (super) and my very first even remotely close attempt at putting myself out there has left me feeling like this is a total crap shoot.
Let me try to understand how things used to work. A guy would like a girl; maybe ask her father for permission to date her; and maybe...just maybe...they would go out on a date. Lord knows what happened after that but seemingly it's NOTHING like what is going on today.
Here is the 'today' scenario. Say you have a friend who has someone who he/she would like you do meet. Awesome - that sounds like a nice little set up. Instead of getting your number, you're more than likely going to be asked/told to find him/her on Facebook. Really? Is this so that this person can go through a series of pictures and wall posts to decide if they want to hang out with you? Talk about judgmental. And that leaves me without a date - at least in that scenario - at least 90% of the time...every time. And what kind of odds are they?
How can a person be expected to get to know a person - or even attempt to know a person - if they are just going to cowardly look through their pictures in the hope that what? They find the other person attractive enough to what??? Send them a message? Not even call or text? I'm not one to talk on the phone like the next person - but this non-verbal communication world that we are all living is is not exactly conducive to meeting someone of any interest. And do you want to know what the funniest thing about this story is right now??? Because you know it's directly related to something that has already happened in my life - this guy hasn't even messaged me? Called me, text me...nothing. Despite telling our mutual friend that he thought I was cute. I'm assuming he took one look through my pictures and decided that I was insane and deleted me right away. What's a girl to do?
Sometimes my mom tells me to 'just sit down' when I go out. The truth of the matter is - I don't even have it in me to do that. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm as addicted to dancing as you can be and if I'm out - I'm up and about - mingling and having a good time. You'll never find me sitting at a bar, attempting to look cute in the hopes that some random, brave man will come up to me and offer to buy me a drink. The more likely scenario is me going up to the bar and buying a round of drinks for the group of people I'm with. No wonder my bank account looks the way that it does. But that's just me.
Side note - as I'm writing this - a commercial for E-Harmony is on. If that's not a sign.. I don't know what is :)
Anyhow - I don't know that I have a question to leave you all with as I don't know what insights anyone can provide that will not result with me having another awkward dating situation..or not dating situation as it may work out - some time in the near future.
So here's to the lessening of the awkwardness.
Cheers.
Let me try to understand how things used to work. A guy would like a girl; maybe ask her father for permission to date her; and maybe...just maybe...they would go out on a date. Lord knows what happened after that but seemingly it's NOTHING like what is going on today.
Here is the 'today' scenario. Say you have a friend who has someone who he/she would like you do meet. Awesome - that sounds like a nice little set up. Instead of getting your number, you're more than likely going to be asked/told to find him/her on Facebook. Really? Is this so that this person can go through a series of pictures and wall posts to decide if they want to hang out with you? Talk about judgmental. And that leaves me without a date - at least in that scenario - at least 90% of the time...every time. And what kind of odds are they?
How can a person be expected to get to know a person - or even attempt to know a person - if they are just going to cowardly look through their pictures in the hope that what? They find the other person attractive enough to what??? Send them a message? Not even call or text? I'm not one to talk on the phone like the next person - but this non-verbal communication world that we are all living is is not exactly conducive to meeting someone of any interest. And do you want to know what the funniest thing about this story is right now??? Because you know it's directly related to something that has already happened in my life - this guy hasn't even messaged me? Called me, text me...nothing. Despite telling our mutual friend that he thought I was cute. I'm assuming he took one look through my pictures and decided that I was insane and deleted me right away. What's a girl to do?
Sometimes my mom tells me to 'just sit down' when I go out. The truth of the matter is - I don't even have it in me to do that. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm as addicted to dancing as you can be and if I'm out - I'm up and about - mingling and having a good time. You'll never find me sitting at a bar, attempting to look cute in the hopes that some random, brave man will come up to me and offer to buy me a drink. The more likely scenario is me going up to the bar and buying a round of drinks for the group of people I'm with. No wonder my bank account looks the way that it does. But that's just me.
Side note - as I'm writing this - a commercial for E-Harmony is on. If that's not a sign.. I don't know what is :)
Anyhow - I don't know that I have a question to leave you all with as I don't know what insights anyone can provide that will not result with me having another awkward dating situation..or not dating situation as it may work out - some time in the near future.
So here's to the lessening of the awkwardness.
Cheers.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Lack of Inspiration
After beginning a blog about an entirely different topic - I've decided to delete it and write about something else. It seems that lately I have had quite a bit of trouble coming up with topics to write about. I'm attributing this to a sudden lack of inspiration - either that or I've lost all concepts of original thought and/or haven't left myself enough free time to actually sit down at my computer as I am right now and have a nice little conversation with all of you. Either way - I am attempting to get back on track with this and hope that you will all inspire me to continue writing about everything and anything.
So let's see...why haven't I had anything to write about lately? If I am to be completely honest with all of you - it's because I haven't been in the mood to give myself any time to think at all. That sounds completely silly but I suppose I've taken a bit of a step back in the emotional okay-ness category and have chosen to fill my time with friends and hanging out - and I'd like to say working out but my stupid blackberry hasn't worked all week so I haven't had an alarm to wake me up in the morning - and this has disabled me from filling your inboxes with the comedic relief you have grown to love about this blog (I hope). And while I'd love to be funny right now - I'm just not in a funny mood.
Quick side note though - driving a 15 passenger van on Friday night to take myself and my friends to a wedding was quite possibly one of the funniest and best decisions I have ever made. Rolling up to a wedding and getting out of what can only be described as an airport van all decked out was priceless.
But yeah - so I'm sure everyone goes through what I am currently going through - however - it's difficult for me to have 'off' moments because I'm always the crazy, bubbly personality that people have become accustomed to. This makes it hard to ever have an off day - everyone is asking you - what's wrong, what can I do to help, why are you not smiling and making me laugh? And while I certainly love making people's days - there are days when I just want to be quiet - believe it or not - and it's becoming apparent that with my personality - it's not the easiest thing to do.
So over the past couple of weeks I have just been overthinking the obvious - probably because I didn't give myself any time at all to really recover after the bullet to the face and it has caused me to randomly experience every type of mood that I try to avoid on a daily basis - anger, sadness, grief, embarrassment, bitterness and maybe even melancholy - if I ever used that word - which I don't.
I guess the ultimate question here is - how are you truly supposed to deal with something that will never make sense to you and no one will ever have an explanation for? Including the person who did it? How can you be expected to move on when the sheer thought of moving on is almost void in your mind? It's as if dating in and of itself is so awful to think about - coupled with the fact that I'm constantly being told that I'm incredibly intimidating which is why no one approaches me when I'm out in public. Seems like a lose/lose situation right now, doesn't it?
Well believe me - I am light years away from actually being down about the whole relationship bit - BUT - and that's a huge BUT - I am having a hard time 'getting back on the horse' as some corny folks would say. Truth be told - I will get back on...just not sure when that will be.
But here's to the start of what I hope will be some inspirational blog posts....and maybe some awkward stories along the way.
So let's see...why haven't I had anything to write about lately? If I am to be completely honest with all of you - it's because I haven't been in the mood to give myself any time to think at all. That sounds completely silly but I suppose I've taken a bit of a step back in the emotional okay-ness category and have chosen to fill my time with friends and hanging out - and I'd like to say working out but my stupid blackberry hasn't worked all week so I haven't had an alarm to wake me up in the morning - and this has disabled me from filling your inboxes with the comedic relief you have grown to love about this blog (I hope). And while I'd love to be funny right now - I'm just not in a funny mood.
Quick side note though - driving a 15 passenger van on Friday night to take myself and my friends to a wedding was quite possibly one of the funniest and best decisions I have ever made. Rolling up to a wedding and getting out of what can only be described as an airport van all decked out was priceless.
But yeah - so I'm sure everyone goes through what I am currently going through - however - it's difficult for me to have 'off' moments because I'm always the crazy, bubbly personality that people have become accustomed to. This makes it hard to ever have an off day - everyone is asking you - what's wrong, what can I do to help, why are you not smiling and making me laugh? And while I certainly love making people's days - there are days when I just want to be quiet - believe it or not - and it's becoming apparent that with my personality - it's not the easiest thing to do.
So over the past couple of weeks I have just been overthinking the obvious - probably because I didn't give myself any time at all to really recover after the bullet to the face and it has caused me to randomly experience every type of mood that I try to avoid on a daily basis - anger, sadness, grief, embarrassment, bitterness and maybe even melancholy - if I ever used that word - which I don't.
I guess the ultimate question here is - how are you truly supposed to deal with something that will never make sense to you and no one will ever have an explanation for? Including the person who did it? How can you be expected to move on when the sheer thought of moving on is almost void in your mind? It's as if dating in and of itself is so awful to think about - coupled with the fact that I'm constantly being told that I'm incredibly intimidating which is why no one approaches me when I'm out in public. Seems like a lose/lose situation right now, doesn't it?
Well believe me - I am light years away from actually being down about the whole relationship bit - BUT - and that's a huge BUT - I am having a hard time 'getting back on the horse' as some corny folks would say. Truth be told - I will get back on...just not sure when that will be.
But here's to the start of what I hope will be some inspirational blog posts....and maybe some awkward stories along the way.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Just Tell Me!
One of my fellow co-workers (if I can call him that) brought up what I hope will be an interesting blog topic for the evening and something that I hope you can all comment on. This particular topic may be difficult for a lot of people to react to - simply because we are all constantly being put into awkward situations where we will do our very best to avoid actually telling each other the truth - HOWEVER - if we have figured me out at this point we know that I am always in favor of being honest. And I'll just go ahead and say why - because if anyone knows me (I guess if they don't, this is a moot point) they know that I would never intentionally hurt someone's feelings - ever. It's just that simple. If something I say happens to be taken a certain way and a person's feelings are hurt - then I would be truly sorry. We all know that the truth hurts sometimes - but to that I say that as long as the end result is the bettering of a person - I am all for it. If it's truly a friend (or whoever) - he or she will get over it.
And now onto the topic after that rambling that just happened. Sorry about that. So today - at work - I was just in yet another meeting for the day and this was a lot more casual than other meetings - and with this 'pseudo co-worker' when I proceeded to tell him that I thought he came across as arrogant. I wasn't trying to be rude - simply expressing to him the vibe that he gives off. And to that he says - 'Has anyone ever told you how you come off to other people?' I said no. After a moment of silence in the name of awkwardness I guess - I asked him - 'Well are you going to tell me?' And he said no.
Which brings me to the point..finally. How on earth can we be expected to fix the never-ending flaws in our personalities, character...however you want to put it.. if no one is telling us what's wrong with us... or how we are coming across to people in what I can only assume is in a negative way. I'm assuming this is contributing to the reason why so many people do not like and/or get along with so many other people for years on end... and yet they continue to be 'friends.' It all makes no sense to me.
I believe - and call me crazy - that there is a way to very diplomatically tell someone about his/her personality flaws. And this would not involve any tears, therapy or removal of friendships on Facebook. I understand that this all depends on the person in question - but if people are genuinely interested in being good people (which I know is a separate topic all together) then they will take this criticism for what it is - constructive criticism - and turn it into a positive. I see no reason to do anything else with it.
Thank you and that concludes my 'I'm living in an idealistic world' speech for the evening. I hope you all have a pleasant event. Goodnight.
And now onto the topic after that rambling that just happened. Sorry about that. So today - at work - I was just in yet another meeting for the day and this was a lot more casual than other meetings - and with this 'pseudo co-worker' when I proceeded to tell him that I thought he came across as arrogant. I wasn't trying to be rude - simply expressing to him the vibe that he gives off. And to that he says - 'Has anyone ever told you how you come off to other people?' I said no. After a moment of silence in the name of awkwardness I guess - I asked him - 'Well are you going to tell me?' And he said no.
Which brings me to the point..finally. How on earth can we be expected to fix the never-ending flaws in our personalities, character...however you want to put it.. if no one is telling us what's wrong with us... or how we are coming across to people in what I can only assume is in a negative way. I'm assuming this is contributing to the reason why so many people do not like and/or get along with so many other people for years on end... and yet they continue to be 'friends.' It all makes no sense to me.
I believe - and call me crazy - that there is a way to very diplomatically tell someone about his/her personality flaws. And this would not involve any tears, therapy or removal of friendships on Facebook. I understand that this all depends on the person in question - but if people are genuinely interested in being good people (which I know is a separate topic all together) then they will take this criticism for what it is - constructive criticism - and turn it into a positive. I see no reason to do anything else with it.
Thank you and that concludes my 'I'm living in an idealistic world' speech for the evening. I hope you all have a pleasant event. Goodnight.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
To Go or Not to Go
Seems like a ridiculous predicament BUT this past weekend was the first of what I'm sure will be many of these scenarios and I figured I would pose the question sooner rather than later. So imagine this completely hypothetical situation:
You were dating someone who you have known for a long long time - so you've known their friends for a really long time and all get along really well. When you break up - I assume there is somewhat of a disclaimer about staying friends with the ex's friends. However, what happens when these friends happen to be friends of yours too - even though you have never actually hung out with them without the other person? That is more than likely more of a coincidence than anything else - just to clarify that previous statement. What is a person to do in this particular situation?
All sorts of questions are going through my mind so maybe I'll just write some of them down so that I can get everyone on the same page as me:
- If you are invited to hang out with these people - do you go even though there is a strong chance the ex might be there? And if you happen to be the type of person who embraces awkward moments - this is a question that does not factor in if you would be fine with seeing the ex or not.
- If you have no one to go with you to the above-mentioned hang out - but really want to go - what do you do?
- Do you assume that the people there think that you're hanging out with them simply because you want to see how the ex is doing or even worse - with the hope of running into the ex?
- Or do you just say fuck it and go and have yourself a great time and not worry about all of the nonsense that clogs our brains when these things happen?
Well, if you know me at this point, you know which of the above I actually did when this past weekend's events presented themselves to me. And I'll tell you what - I could not have been happier with my decision.
Regardless of the fact that I seem to have handled the situation the way I wanted to - I am still curious to see what the general public thinks of this scenario. So please enlighten me.
And I hope you all had a lovely weekend.
Cheers.
You were dating someone who you have known for a long long time - so you've known their friends for a really long time and all get along really well. When you break up - I assume there is somewhat of a disclaimer about staying friends with the ex's friends. However, what happens when these friends happen to be friends of yours too - even though you have never actually hung out with them without the other person? That is more than likely more of a coincidence than anything else - just to clarify that previous statement. What is a person to do in this particular situation?
All sorts of questions are going through my mind so maybe I'll just write some of them down so that I can get everyone on the same page as me:
- If you are invited to hang out with these people - do you go even though there is a strong chance the ex might be there? And if you happen to be the type of person who embraces awkward moments - this is a question that does not factor in if you would be fine with seeing the ex or not.
- If you have no one to go with you to the above-mentioned hang out - but really want to go - what do you do?
- Do you assume that the people there think that you're hanging out with them simply because you want to see how the ex is doing or even worse - with the hope of running into the ex?
- Or do you just say fuck it and go and have yourself a great time and not worry about all of the nonsense that clogs our brains when these things happen?
Well, if you know me at this point, you know which of the above I actually did when this past weekend's events presented themselves to me. And I'll tell you what - I could not have been happier with my decision.
Regardless of the fact that I seem to have handled the situation the way I wanted to - I am still curious to see what the general public thinks of this scenario. So please enlighten me.
And I hope you all had a lovely weekend.
Cheers.
Monday, June 14, 2010
For Christina and Dan...
Every now and again I - very fortunately - get to take a break from my daily thought process which often involves questioning human behavior in general - to write about my amazing friends. In this particular instance, I could not be MORE excited to be writing about how my very best friend in the whole world - Miss Christina Hoarle - just got engaged to her very long time boyfriend, Dan.
Despite knowing that this was coming for quite some time now, it in no way takes away from my sheer bliss that this day has arrived. I will do my very best to keep this short as to not embarrass Christina and hopefully say my congratulations in a succinct way.
Knowing this wonderful woman back when she was just a little girl - with the most adorable side ponytail you have ever seen - I feel so lucky to be around for what is bound to be the greatest day of her life. Regardless of her endless achievements, successful career and quite possibly one of the most amazing families ever, there is one thing that she has yet to experience and that is the spotlight. For the 20-something years (wow) that I have known her, Christina has and continues to be the most selfless and thoughtful girl I have ever met. She takes after her mother in her - what can I get for you.. eat...eat.. eat...mentality; her - I'll help you out with that.. I'd love to come with you to do this attitude - even though her insane job has her working upwards of 80 hours a week at times.
And with all of that - she has still turned out to be an absolutely amazing friend, sister, daughter and now fiance and I really cannot describe in words how happy I am for her.
Chris - I know we say this all the time but I feel lucky every day to have you as my friend and I really could not be happier for you at this time in your life.
And Dan - don't think I forgot about you - there isn't a guy out there who is more suited, more hands-on or who would ever love her more than you do...and I'm so confident when I say that. Seeing you guys together over the past 5 years has made me so happy and so hopeful that someday I'll be able to have the type of relationship that the two of you have - maybe minus all of the manual labor :)
I love you two so much and wish you nothing but all of the happiness in the world. Congratulations.
Despite knowing that this was coming for quite some time now, it in no way takes away from my sheer bliss that this day has arrived. I will do my very best to keep this short as to not embarrass Christina and hopefully say my congratulations in a succinct way.
Knowing this wonderful woman back when she was just a little girl - with the most adorable side ponytail you have ever seen - I feel so lucky to be around for what is bound to be the greatest day of her life. Regardless of her endless achievements, successful career and quite possibly one of the most amazing families ever, there is one thing that she has yet to experience and that is the spotlight. For the 20-something years (wow) that I have known her, Christina has and continues to be the most selfless and thoughtful girl I have ever met. She takes after her mother in her - what can I get for you.. eat...eat.. eat...mentality; her - I'll help you out with that.. I'd love to come with you to do this attitude - even though her insane job has her working upwards of 80 hours a week at times.
And with all of that - she has still turned out to be an absolutely amazing friend, sister, daughter and now fiance and I really cannot describe in words how happy I am for her.
Chris - I know we say this all the time but I feel lucky every day to have you as my friend and I really could not be happier for you at this time in your life.
And Dan - don't think I forgot about you - there isn't a guy out there who is more suited, more hands-on or who would ever love her more than you do...and I'm so confident when I say that. Seeing you guys together over the past 5 years has made me so happy and so hopeful that someday I'll be able to have the type of relationship that the two of you have - maybe minus all of the manual labor :)
I love you two so much and wish you nothing but all of the happiness in the world. Congratulations.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Cheating or Nothing
After a couple of requests and a conversation here and there I'm feeling inclined to write about this to see what people think. I'll try to keep it short and sweet - since the recent posts after the hiatus have been a bit on the lengthy side.
Let's pretend you're looking in at this from the outside of the situation. If you were in a relationship with someone and you could have the choice between the relationship ending because he/she cheated on you OR to just be dumped clear out of nowhere with no given reason and no way to change the situation yourself or do anything differently to change the situation - which would you choose?
I understand that neither of these outcomes are ideal - but for shit's sake - let's say you absolutely had to choose one? Which would it be? Being that I have lived through both of these - I am 100% inclined to say that I would - without a doubt in my mind - prefer to be cheated on then left out to dry with no explanation or reasoning. The latter leaves you confused, slightly crazy and just all together thinking WHAT THE *uck! on a regular basis - and who wants anything to do with that?
And sure - when someone cheats on you that leaves you insecure, wondering why on earth would he/she do something like that to you - but - you can normally chalk it up to the other person being an idiot because if you're confident enough in yourself as a person - you would know that it's that person's loss if they let you go. And you really have to believe that - or at least work on yourself as a person until you believe that.
So what do you think? I'm very interested so please share.
And have a great weekend.
Let's pretend you're looking in at this from the outside of the situation. If you were in a relationship with someone and you could have the choice between the relationship ending because he/she cheated on you OR to just be dumped clear out of nowhere with no given reason and no way to change the situation yourself or do anything differently to change the situation - which would you choose?
I understand that neither of these outcomes are ideal - but for shit's sake - let's say you absolutely had to choose one? Which would it be? Being that I have lived through both of these - I am 100% inclined to say that I would - without a doubt in my mind - prefer to be cheated on then left out to dry with no explanation or reasoning. The latter leaves you confused, slightly crazy and just all together thinking WHAT THE *uck! on a regular basis - and who wants anything to do with that?
And sure - when someone cheats on you that leaves you insecure, wondering why on earth would he/she do something like that to you - but - you can normally chalk it up to the other person being an idiot because if you're confident enough in yourself as a person - you would know that it's that person's loss if they let you go. And you really have to believe that - or at least work on yourself as a person until you believe that.
So what do you think? I'm very interested so please share.
And have a great weekend.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Jealousy is Another Way of Saying...
It's funny how random my blog topic selection is, and while I will keep this one completely anonymous, I will say that it was a result of something that I saw on Facebook (how shocking). Despite knowing that what I saw wasn't true jealousy, it did spark a thought in my always-churning brain that made me want to write this down. It's either that or I am avoiding posting the two blog posts that I wrote both during and post break-up so we'll just stick with the latter here :)
In regards to jealousy, I have to say that I believe Webster has gotten it all wrong - at least when you're talking about jealousy in relationships. I have absolutely no comment on jealousy when it comes to friendships or just in general in life when people are jealous of other people. I'd like to believe that it is more envy on that person's part but when all is said and done - people ultimately do not wish good things on other people for some sick and twisted reason and I find that to be very unfortunate. So much for no comment.
In relationships, it appears to me that jealousy can be directly attributed to insecurity and who really wants any part in that? Not me. And maybe that makes one of us, but I feel as though people would be lying if they said that they thoroughly enjoyed those conversations that either take place at bars, outside of bars, or on the way home from bars that go something like this:
Her: Who was that girl you were talking to?
Him: Oh - she's an old friend of mine from college who I haven't seen in years.
Her: Really? So did you sleep with her in college?
Him: What?
Her: You heard me. Did you sleep with her in college or even come remotely close to thinking about sleeping with her.
Him: No. I just said we were just friends.
Her: We're not speaking and I want to go home.
Please keep in mind - I know I have created an extreme exaggeration here, but let's just call a spade a spade - people are INSANELY jealous and I feel as though it is time wasted. And this goes for both sexes. Guys are equally, if not more so, jealous of girls when they are out and end up talking to another guy. It's as if no one (for the most part) is dating someone who they truly believe is 'into them.' Isn't that sad? Isn't it sad to know that even when you're in a relationship and you can have all of the good times in the world that there will always always always come a time when you're thinking or better yet - worried - that your significant other - is cheating on you, thinking of cheating on you, or heaven forbid - looking at another guy/girl.
And for those of you who fall into this category - I offer you this tad bit of advice:
Sure - there are going to be times when you're out and your boyfriend/girlfriend see someone who they haven't seen in a while, or who they always had a thing for and maybe - just maybe - it will spark something and they will want to be with that said person rather than you. That's not your fault - first of all - but obviously it's not ideal. For all of the other relatively normal relationships we have all been in - I highly recommend being a little bit more understanding of how the mind works. At the end of the day - everyone is attracted to new and exciting people on a regular basis. That doesn't mean that they want to end what could have been a 4 year relationship over it. And I'll tell you one more thing - having those 'all the time' conversations about how much he/she is flirting when you're out in public or not paying you enough attention or whatever the case may be where you are bringing up these full-of-question conversations that are always arguments - will more than likely lead you all the way back to single life. And let's face it - dating is weird enough as it is so maybe if we were all just a little more confident and had faith that while yes - (and this is hypothetical) - my boyfriend may look at a girl and think to himself - wow.. she's so hot...I'd like to do X, Y and Z to her...if he really cares about me he won't.
Here's to witnessing less arguments in public when I'm out just trying to have a good time :)
In regards to jealousy, I have to say that I believe Webster has gotten it all wrong - at least when you're talking about jealousy in relationships. I have absolutely no comment on jealousy when it comes to friendships or just in general in life when people are jealous of other people. I'd like to believe that it is more envy on that person's part but when all is said and done - people ultimately do not wish good things on other people for some sick and twisted reason and I find that to be very unfortunate. So much for no comment.
In relationships, it appears to me that jealousy can be directly attributed to insecurity and who really wants any part in that? Not me. And maybe that makes one of us, but I feel as though people would be lying if they said that they thoroughly enjoyed those conversations that either take place at bars, outside of bars, or on the way home from bars that go something like this:
Her: Who was that girl you were talking to?
Him: Oh - she's an old friend of mine from college who I haven't seen in years.
Her: Really? So did you sleep with her in college?
Him: What?
Her: You heard me. Did you sleep with her in college or even come remotely close to thinking about sleeping with her.
Him: No. I just said we were just friends.
Her: We're not speaking and I want to go home.
Please keep in mind - I know I have created an extreme exaggeration here, but let's just call a spade a spade - people are INSANELY jealous and I feel as though it is time wasted. And this goes for both sexes. Guys are equally, if not more so, jealous of girls when they are out and end up talking to another guy. It's as if no one (for the most part) is dating someone who they truly believe is 'into them.' Isn't that sad? Isn't it sad to know that even when you're in a relationship and you can have all of the good times in the world that there will always always always come a time when you're thinking or better yet - worried - that your significant other - is cheating on you, thinking of cheating on you, or heaven forbid - looking at another guy/girl.
And for those of you who fall into this category - I offer you this tad bit of advice:
Sure - there are going to be times when you're out and your boyfriend/girlfriend see someone who they haven't seen in a while, or who they always had a thing for and maybe - just maybe - it will spark something and they will want to be with that said person rather than you. That's not your fault - first of all - but obviously it's not ideal. For all of the other relatively normal relationships we have all been in - I highly recommend being a little bit more understanding of how the mind works. At the end of the day - everyone is attracted to new and exciting people on a regular basis. That doesn't mean that they want to end what could have been a 4 year relationship over it. And I'll tell you one more thing - having those 'all the time' conversations about how much he/she is flirting when you're out in public or not paying you enough attention or whatever the case may be where you are bringing up these full-of-question conversations that are always arguments - will more than likely lead you all the way back to single life. And let's face it - dating is weird enough as it is so maybe if we were all just a little more confident and had faith that while yes - (and this is hypothetical) - my boyfriend may look at a girl and think to himself - wow.. she's so hot...I'd like to do X, Y and Z to her...if he really cares about me he won't.
Here's to witnessing less arguments in public when I'm out just trying to have a good time :)
Monday, June 7, 2010
The Real World: Bugs Ruin Everything
Without spending too much time apologizing - yet again - for the lack of attention paid to my blog over the past couple of months - I would just like to quickly say that I'm sorry and I hope it doesn't happen again.
During this particular hiatus I have certainly had my fair share of ups and downs. And even though things seem to have ended with a down - I would be lying if I said that the time wasn't spent with mostly ups. No further details will be given at this time as this post is meant to be dedicated to the past two weekends of work that have consumed my life.
After coming off of what will definitely go down as my greatest work-related weekend ever - I feel like a new woman. Despite already knowing the majority of the people on the trip - minus the 3D artists from London - I feel like we were forced into our own miniature version of The Real World and I have to say - I loved it. Normally I wouldn't be a fan of working on the weekends, in the blazing heat, moving boxes and setting endless tables up while I entertain people and get wild children to stand in exactly the right space - but just like anything else in life - if you're with the right people - anything can be fun.
And here is the cast:
JC - the shy intern who very quickly developed an English accent that far exceeded the rest of ours for the entirety of the trip. If I had to say one thing about her it would be that I envy her willingness to ask millions of questions that most people would never dare to ask - and for that she is more confident than she realizes.
AS - the not so shy intern who is quite possibly the biggest Philly team fan I have ever encountered - at least female fan - and thanks to her 'I don't really give a shit' attitude - we were able to tear up the dance floor down in Georgetown for our last night out as a group.
CS - Wow. Really brought the A-game and if I had to give an MVP for Saturday night - it would be him.
Max - Just a couple of words to describe this man - Hilarious, honest, refuses to use sunblock, musically talented, artistically talented, blunt, hot mess and margaritas.
Joe - What to say about an insanely talented artist, writer, actor who seemingly finds his incredible lifestyle to be boring to say the least. He does remind me of a young Sean Connery - so he's got that going for him - which is nice.
EB - What can I say about myself that you all don't already know? Apparently I'm extremely motherly, slightly controlling and have anxiety when I'm in a situation that I can't completely control. Hopefully I'll grow out of it.
Needless to say - you learn a hell of a lot about people when you're forced into a bunch of long working days and overnight adventures with them, but if I had to sum up this 3D tour, I would say this:
Often times in life - we are forced into situations that we wouldn't normally choose to be put in; however, if you keep an open mind and recognize that no matter what you always have an opportunity to learn something about yourself, every experience is for the better. And I can say with confidence that these past two weekends have opened my eyes to things that I hope to do in the future and have helped me get through things that are now a part of my past.
In closing - maybe Bugs really don't Ruin Everything - cause I had a hell of a time.
Thanks guys.
During this particular hiatus I have certainly had my fair share of ups and downs. And even though things seem to have ended with a down - I would be lying if I said that the time wasn't spent with mostly ups. No further details will be given at this time as this post is meant to be dedicated to the past two weekends of work that have consumed my life.
After coming off of what will definitely go down as my greatest work-related weekend ever - I feel like a new woman. Despite already knowing the majority of the people on the trip - minus the 3D artists from London - I feel like we were forced into our own miniature version of The Real World and I have to say - I loved it. Normally I wouldn't be a fan of working on the weekends, in the blazing heat, moving boxes and setting endless tables up while I entertain people and get wild children to stand in exactly the right space - but just like anything else in life - if you're with the right people - anything can be fun.
And here is the cast:
JC - the shy intern who very quickly developed an English accent that far exceeded the rest of ours for the entirety of the trip. If I had to say one thing about her it would be that I envy her willingness to ask millions of questions that most people would never dare to ask - and for that she is more confident than she realizes.
AS - the not so shy intern who is quite possibly the biggest Philly team fan I have ever encountered - at least female fan - and thanks to her 'I don't really give a shit' attitude - we were able to tear up the dance floor down in Georgetown for our last night out as a group.
CS - Wow. Really brought the A-game and if I had to give an MVP for Saturday night - it would be him.
Max - Just a couple of words to describe this man - Hilarious, honest, refuses to use sunblock, musically talented, artistically talented, blunt, hot mess and margaritas.
Joe - What to say about an insanely talented artist, writer, actor who seemingly finds his incredible lifestyle to be boring to say the least. He does remind me of a young Sean Connery - so he's got that going for him - which is nice.
EB - What can I say about myself that you all don't already know? Apparently I'm extremely motherly, slightly controlling and have anxiety when I'm in a situation that I can't completely control. Hopefully I'll grow out of it.
Needless to say - you learn a hell of a lot about people when you're forced into a bunch of long working days and overnight adventures with them, but if I had to sum up this 3D tour, I would say this:
Often times in life - we are forced into situations that we wouldn't normally choose to be put in; however, if you keep an open mind and recognize that no matter what you always have an opportunity to learn something about yourself, every experience is for the better. And I can say with confidence that these past two weekends have opened my eyes to things that I hope to do in the future and have helped me get through things that are now a part of my past.
In closing - maybe Bugs really don't Ruin Everything - cause I had a hell of a time.
Thanks guys.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Enough of Stating the Obvious
The obvious in this situation is that I have been absolutely awful at keeping up with my blog. People have been blaming it on a whole slew of issues - none of which can be attributed any longer to Lyme's Disease because I apparently never had that to begin with. Doctors are such a waste of time - clearly. But rather than focus on why I have been the worst blogger in the world, I would like to shed some light on one of my bigger pet peeves in life.
And so the story goes....(brace yourselves)
As it turns out - yesterday was one of my less enjoyable Fridays at work. It was supposed to go very smoothly - get into work - the printer was bringing in a proof that I would bring to my client - get approved and be on my merry way down to my very first press check. Awesome. Unfortunately - that's not at all how it turned out.
On my way in I get an email from the printer saying there is a huge problem with the one file that was uploaded the night before and they can't make the changes that need to be made. Needless to say - now I don't have my proof in the morning and instead - I'm working with someone to make the changes so that I can leave. There's just one HUGE problem - no one can come with me and I have ZERO production experience. Not the best case scenario when you're talking about a $25K printing job. And what is the last thing I want to hear in this situation? 'Wow...that really sucks. Press checks are the worst. Sounds like you're going to have a real shitty day. Oh man." Unbelievable. Why do people say things like this? Blows my mind every time.
So now I'm just livid but I have to leave anyway - get on the road and immediately sit in stand still traffic for hours. Only to get down to Pennsauken and have NO IDEA where the road I need is. None. I stop at three different locations for directions. Turns out no one in Pennsauken knows anything at all - including where the road I need is located. First guy's response - (insert awkward head nod due to the fact that he speaks zero English). Second guy's response - incoherent directions that sounded something like this: 'You go down this road about a mile and a half...and then the road kinda does a little something - you want to not go right, but not go left...just kinda stay right there and you'll see it. Okay buddy. Thanks for sounding dumber than idiot #1. And then comes the third guy - who I had to ask to spell out the street name he was directing me too because he had no teeth and I couldn't understand a word he was saying. Super.
Now I'm at my wits end and somewhere around 3 hours late. I hate being late. I finally get to the place and they have a nice little name tag for me. It reads: Erin Bijar. Wow. Icing on the cake. At this point, I could care less about pretty much anything - this day is just a disaster and that's the end of that story.
Boy was I wrong. So imagine it's 1230 on a Friday and you're at a printer at a press check (hard to imagine I'm sure but just pretend) and everyone keeps hinting at the fact that it's going to be a long night. So I finally ask how long are we going to be here and my rep tells me UNTIL MIDNIGHT! I'm like - are you serious?
To make a long story short - I wasn't there until midnight - but 8PM - which was still awful. At least the piece looks nice otherwise I don't know what I would have done.
And there you have it. If someone you know is having an absolutely awful day - please do not remind him/her that the day is going to be just horrendous. Last thing they want to hear. Instead - try to be helpful or don't say anything at all. That's probably best.
Enjoy the weekend! And I'll try to be better about writing. I do miss it.
And so the story goes....(brace yourselves)
As it turns out - yesterday was one of my less enjoyable Fridays at work. It was supposed to go very smoothly - get into work - the printer was bringing in a proof that I would bring to my client - get approved and be on my merry way down to my very first press check. Awesome. Unfortunately - that's not at all how it turned out.
On my way in I get an email from the printer saying there is a huge problem with the one file that was uploaded the night before and they can't make the changes that need to be made. Needless to say - now I don't have my proof in the morning and instead - I'm working with someone to make the changes so that I can leave. There's just one HUGE problem - no one can come with me and I have ZERO production experience. Not the best case scenario when you're talking about a $25K printing job. And what is the last thing I want to hear in this situation? 'Wow...that really sucks. Press checks are the worst. Sounds like you're going to have a real shitty day. Oh man." Unbelievable. Why do people say things like this? Blows my mind every time.
So now I'm just livid but I have to leave anyway - get on the road and immediately sit in stand still traffic for hours. Only to get down to Pennsauken and have NO IDEA where the road I need is. None. I stop at three different locations for directions. Turns out no one in Pennsauken knows anything at all - including where the road I need is located. First guy's response - (insert awkward head nod due to the fact that he speaks zero English). Second guy's response - incoherent directions that sounded something like this: 'You go down this road about a mile and a half...and then the road kinda does a little something - you want to not go right, but not go left...just kinda stay right there and you'll see it. Okay buddy. Thanks for sounding dumber than idiot #1. And then comes the third guy - who I had to ask to spell out the street name he was directing me too because he had no teeth and I couldn't understand a word he was saying. Super.
Now I'm at my wits end and somewhere around 3 hours late. I hate being late. I finally get to the place and they have a nice little name tag for me. It reads: Erin Bijar. Wow. Icing on the cake. At this point, I could care less about pretty much anything - this day is just a disaster and that's the end of that story.
Boy was I wrong. So imagine it's 1230 on a Friday and you're at a printer at a press check (hard to imagine I'm sure but just pretend) and everyone keeps hinting at the fact that it's going to be a long night. So I finally ask how long are we going to be here and my rep tells me UNTIL MIDNIGHT! I'm like - are you serious?
To make a long story short - I wasn't there until midnight - but 8PM - which was still awful. At least the piece looks nice otherwise I don't know what I would have done.
And there you have it. If someone you know is having an absolutely awful day - please do not remind him/her that the day is going to be just horrendous. Last thing they want to hear. Instead - try to be helpful or don't say anything at all. That's probably best.
Enjoy the weekend! And I'll try to be better about writing. I do miss it.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
My Very Deepest Sympathy
After contemplating posting this - being that I wrote half of this four days ago and the other half right now - I have decided to post my entry in memory of the late Dan Cresci - the brother and very best friend to my good friend Jonathan.
Sadness does not even begin to describe the emotions I have been feeling since hearing the news that one of my long time friends lost his brother. His brother who, in my opinion, was not even given an opportunity to show the world his talents, was recently killed in what police are saying is a murder-suicide.
Always the aspiring entrepreneur, Dan Cresci was working on projects since the day I met him. In high school, if the guys weren’t helping him with the valet business, they were helping him try to open up a pizza parlor. Regardless of the project, I know – even without knowing Dan very well myself – that whatever he was doing he was putting everything he had into it.
And now there is a life that has been cut incredibly short. A family that has been through so much is now struggling to even find the words to explain what a town can only describe as one of the worst tragedies in Monmouth County’s history. Even saying that at my age – when I have only been around for 26 years – I am confident that my statement holds water.
Last night’s services were yet another indication that not only was Dan Cresci an amazing human being, but he meant so much more than he will ever know to the people whose lives he crossed paths with. Endless people flooded the Shore Points Funeral Home last night for what I can only describe as the nicest, most well put together wake I have ever been to. Factoring in the incredible tragedy of the situation – the slideshow, the music, the family and the friends made it a night I will never forget.
And that brings me to my ultimate conclusion. I have the most amazing friends in the world. Friends who have been around – for the most part – since elementary school. People who would, at any given moment, be there for each other – no matter what. This recent tragedy is yet another indication of how lucky we all are.
Upon hearing the horrible news, everyone was in contact to decide how we would be there for our friend. Some visited daily, others handled arrangements in terms of what we would get the family as a token of our sincerest sympathies and others simply offered condolences. No matter the gesture, it is and always will be 100% genuine and that is the difference. In fact, after listening to the speeches at the wake last night, it was enlightening to hear how highly everyone – family, friends, neighbors, acquaintances – regarded Dan Cresci.
With every challenge he faced – businesses, school, businesses, school – he faced them with a determination that most will not put forth in a lifetime. And these were the words of his own father – a man who had just lost his son and the poise and eloquence with which he spoke of him was truly an inspiration to me. In fact, the way the entire family composed themselves should have been an inspiration to everyone in that room last night.
So often are we all concerned with the pieces that make up our own lives, that we are only reminded of the accomplishments of others when they are put right in front of our faces. This, of course, is of no fault of our own – but is rather a reality that we all have to live with daily. In the light of this recent tragedy, and in honor of Dan Cresci and everything that he believed in as an entrepreneur, a lawyer, a mentor, an uncle, a son and a brother’s very best friend, I hope that everyone whose life he touched will hold a piece of Dan in their hearts in a way that will remind them that every day you have the opportunity to do something great. And no project, job, assignment or even friend, is ever too small to be the greatest thing to come your way.
I’ll end with a line from the song that Dan’s family chose to close out last night’s services: ‘Who can say I’ve been changed for the better….because I knew you….I have been changed for good.’
May he rest in peace and my very very deepest sympathies will be with Cresci and his family for quite some time.
Sadness does not even begin to describe the emotions I have been feeling since hearing the news that one of my long time friends lost his brother. His brother who, in my opinion, was not even given an opportunity to show the world his talents, was recently killed in what police are saying is a murder-suicide.
Always the aspiring entrepreneur, Dan Cresci was working on projects since the day I met him. In high school, if the guys weren’t helping him with the valet business, they were helping him try to open up a pizza parlor. Regardless of the project, I know – even without knowing Dan very well myself – that whatever he was doing he was putting everything he had into it.
And now there is a life that has been cut incredibly short. A family that has been through so much is now struggling to even find the words to explain what a town can only describe as one of the worst tragedies in Monmouth County’s history. Even saying that at my age – when I have only been around for 26 years – I am confident that my statement holds water.
Last night’s services were yet another indication that not only was Dan Cresci an amazing human being, but he meant so much more than he will ever know to the people whose lives he crossed paths with. Endless people flooded the Shore Points Funeral Home last night for what I can only describe as the nicest, most well put together wake I have ever been to. Factoring in the incredible tragedy of the situation – the slideshow, the music, the family and the friends made it a night I will never forget.
And that brings me to my ultimate conclusion. I have the most amazing friends in the world. Friends who have been around – for the most part – since elementary school. People who would, at any given moment, be there for each other – no matter what. This recent tragedy is yet another indication of how lucky we all are.
Upon hearing the horrible news, everyone was in contact to decide how we would be there for our friend. Some visited daily, others handled arrangements in terms of what we would get the family as a token of our sincerest sympathies and others simply offered condolences. No matter the gesture, it is and always will be 100% genuine and that is the difference. In fact, after listening to the speeches at the wake last night, it was enlightening to hear how highly everyone – family, friends, neighbors, acquaintances – regarded Dan Cresci.
With every challenge he faced – businesses, school, businesses, school – he faced them with a determination that most will not put forth in a lifetime. And these were the words of his own father – a man who had just lost his son and the poise and eloquence with which he spoke of him was truly an inspiration to me. In fact, the way the entire family composed themselves should have been an inspiration to everyone in that room last night.
So often are we all concerned with the pieces that make up our own lives, that we are only reminded of the accomplishments of others when they are put right in front of our faces. This, of course, is of no fault of our own – but is rather a reality that we all have to live with daily. In the light of this recent tragedy, and in honor of Dan Cresci and everything that he believed in as an entrepreneur, a lawyer, a mentor, an uncle, a son and a brother’s very best friend, I hope that everyone whose life he touched will hold a piece of Dan in their hearts in a way that will remind them that every day you have the opportunity to do something great. And no project, job, assignment or even friend, is ever too small to be the greatest thing to come your way.
I’ll end with a line from the song that Dan’s family chose to close out last night’s services: ‘Who can say I’ve been changed for the better….because I knew you….I have been changed for good.’
May he rest in peace and my very very deepest sympathies will be with Cresci and his family for quite some time.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Spat in the Face
There is absolutely NO WAY that I couldn't write about what happened to me in New York City today - so without any further aaa-doooo (there is an actual way to spell that...just not now).
Today started off like any other lovely Thursday. I woke up, took a nice long shower to my mother's dismay, she took me to my favorite coffee place where I purchased a nice 20 oz. coffee and a bagel for her and off to the train station for a nice day out of the office. You see.. I was to be spending this day in New York City - sitting in on casting callbacks for one my clients at work. Sounds awesome, right?
Well it was. Being that this was my first time partaking in something like this - I was looking at it as glorified people watching - only I was getting to judge these people - which was both awesome and awful at the same time. Regardless...this was a good day. Around noon, I head over to a local bar with my boss to grab a bite. Come to find out this place has one of my favorite beers on tap - Purple Haze - along with so many others that I haven't heard of. I was contemplating cancelling the rest of my day at callbacks and testing the sampler for the remainder of the afternoon. And to top it off - the chicken cheesesteak was amazing...but that is not the point of this story.
After what can only be categorized as an awesome day of 'work' - I pack up my things and head out for my very nice walk to Penn Station. I'm walking along like any other pedestrian - same speeds, same expressions as everyone else - just really minding my business. When all of a sudden SPLAT!!! A crazy woman - who I can only assume was homeless or crazy or clearly both - spits all over the left side of my face and my hair. I mean just really showered me with whatever leftover Grapeaid was in her mouth - along with a good portion of her saliva. GROSS!!
Now I'm sure you're wondering what my reaction was. Well - I'm sure anyone who's ever been splashed, not spit on, by another human - knows that you naturally say - What the Fuck?!?!?! Wipe your face off and potentially go up to this person and say something else - like what is your problem?
I screamed - WHAT THE FUCK?!!??! And then this insane creature starts cursing at me in her language which I'm assuming was English - or some dialect of - and I get the hell out of there immediately. Call my mother who can only assume the worst has happened and I am just outraged by what has just happened! OUTRAGED I tell you. And yet - at the same time I'm telling my mom and then my friend Leeann this story - I am simultaneously thinking to myself - of course this would happen to me. Who the hell else has these stories?!?!?
And there you have it. The tale of an innocent young lady who got showered with already-ingested Grapeaid on her way to Penn Station after what was previously a phenomenal day.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it. And maybe explain what the hell is wrong with people in NYC.
Goodnight.
Today started off like any other lovely Thursday. I woke up, took a nice long shower to my mother's dismay, she took me to my favorite coffee place where I purchased a nice 20 oz. coffee and a bagel for her and off to the train station for a nice day out of the office. You see.. I was to be spending this day in New York City - sitting in on casting callbacks for one my clients at work. Sounds awesome, right?
Well it was. Being that this was my first time partaking in something like this - I was looking at it as glorified people watching - only I was getting to judge these people - which was both awesome and awful at the same time. Regardless...this was a good day. Around noon, I head over to a local bar with my boss to grab a bite. Come to find out this place has one of my favorite beers on tap - Purple Haze - along with so many others that I haven't heard of. I was contemplating cancelling the rest of my day at callbacks and testing the sampler for the remainder of the afternoon. And to top it off - the chicken cheesesteak was amazing...but that is not the point of this story.
After what can only be categorized as an awesome day of 'work' - I pack up my things and head out for my very nice walk to Penn Station. I'm walking along like any other pedestrian - same speeds, same expressions as everyone else - just really minding my business. When all of a sudden SPLAT!!! A crazy woman - who I can only assume was homeless or crazy or clearly both - spits all over the left side of my face and my hair. I mean just really showered me with whatever leftover Grapeaid was in her mouth - along with a good portion of her saliva. GROSS!!
Now I'm sure you're wondering what my reaction was. Well - I'm sure anyone who's ever been splashed, not spit on, by another human - knows that you naturally say - What the Fuck?!?!?! Wipe your face off and potentially go up to this person and say something else - like what is your problem?
I screamed - WHAT THE FUCK?!!??! And then this insane creature starts cursing at me in her language which I'm assuming was English - or some dialect of - and I get the hell out of there immediately. Call my mother who can only assume the worst has happened and I am just outraged by what has just happened! OUTRAGED I tell you. And yet - at the same time I'm telling my mom and then my friend Leeann this story - I am simultaneously thinking to myself - of course this would happen to me. Who the hell else has these stories?!?!?
And there you have it. The tale of an innocent young lady who got showered with already-ingested Grapeaid on her way to Penn Station after what was previously a phenomenal day.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it. And maybe explain what the hell is wrong with people in NYC.
Goodnight.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Too Much Hating
As I sit here on the lovely non-holiday that we call Valentine's Day - watching Definitely, Maybe because I love this movie - I am compelled to write about my take on this day. At this stage in my life I am very uninterested in having any qualms with V-day. Honest take on the whole thing - it's Corporate America's way of turning a profit during a down time in spending. End of story.
And people can say what they want about the day. Girls expect all of these flowers, chocolates, stuffed animals, etc. I am not one to make that sort of blanket statement - but I can honestly say that I do not fall into that category of people. For me - Valentine's Day is an excuse to maybe go out for a nice seafood dinner...AND NEVER CALL HIM AGAIN! No, but seriously, it's just another day! It doesn't matter if you've celebrated the day with a 100 people or zero people - who really cares?
Why do people get so anxious and all together angry on this day/weekend (depending on when it falls)? I don't get it. It makes me believe that either 1 - People genuinely do not want other people to be happy and/or 2 - Everyone is just a little more selfish than they'd like to admit.
Like I'm always saying - I am very fortunate to have the greatest friends in the world and for the past couple years - whether we are involved or single - we all end up hanging out in a group of some size - and have an absolute blast. Just shootin' the shit - laughing hysterically and really chucking it up. I highly encourage other people to do the same in years to come and stop being such haters.
And here comes my philosophical statement of the day - In life, we are all going to go on shitty dates, awesome dates, have good experiences and bad - but you should never regret anything you do (this is idealistic.. and I understand that..moving on) or resent someone for just being generally happy. No one wants to be around a Debbie Downer...so let's just not even go there.
Best of luck next year. For now.. I hope you all have a lovely day.
Cheers :)
And people can say what they want about the day. Girls expect all of these flowers, chocolates, stuffed animals, etc. I am not one to make that sort of blanket statement - but I can honestly say that I do not fall into that category of people. For me - Valentine's Day is an excuse to maybe go out for a nice seafood dinner...AND NEVER CALL HIM AGAIN! No, but seriously, it's just another day! It doesn't matter if you've celebrated the day with a 100 people or zero people - who really cares?
Why do people get so anxious and all together angry on this day/weekend (depending on when it falls)? I don't get it. It makes me believe that either 1 - People genuinely do not want other people to be happy and/or 2 - Everyone is just a little more selfish than they'd like to admit.
Like I'm always saying - I am very fortunate to have the greatest friends in the world and for the past couple years - whether we are involved or single - we all end up hanging out in a group of some size - and have an absolute blast. Just shootin' the shit - laughing hysterically and really chucking it up. I highly encourage other people to do the same in years to come and stop being such haters.
And here comes my philosophical statement of the day - In life, we are all going to go on shitty dates, awesome dates, have good experiences and bad - but you should never regret anything you do (this is idealistic.. and I understand that..moving on) or resent someone for just being generally happy. No one wants to be around a Debbie Downer...so let's just not even go there.
Best of luck next year. For now.. I hope you all have a lovely day.
Cheers :)
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Snow Days
Ahhhh. Another storm in New Jersey. As frustrated as people get when it snows I have to say it has a very different affect on me. While I am certainly never one to be frustrated when it snows because of the inconvenience it causes me when I want to go out and get something delicious for lunch...or if it's during the week when it turns my already long commute into a cluster fuck of idiots who forget how to drive when the roads are not crystal clear.
What bothers me about snow days is that I seem to have a really hard time sitting around doing absolutely nothing. Right this very second it could be because I have such a severe pain in my hip that lying down for a long period of time pains me to no end when I finally decide to stand up - hence the reason I have already shoveled my driveway twice...and some of the road just for shits and giggles. But seriously - most people - I would think - look forward to days of nothing. Why on earth do I have such a hard time with this?
Not sure I have the answer to this, but I have some potential reasons:
1- I have some strong case of overactivity - which I am defining as the act of doing things at all times for no apparent reason.
2- I feel lazy sitting around all day when this is CLEARLY what my body needs.
3- It makes me feel like my brother and that concerns me - even though I love him to death. His work ethic is questionable.
4- I'm addicted to hanging out.
And there you have it. Any chance I can get some opinions on this or at least someone to admit to having the same problem?
I hope so.
Enjoy the snow:)
What bothers me about snow days is that I seem to have a really hard time sitting around doing absolutely nothing. Right this very second it could be because I have such a severe pain in my hip that lying down for a long period of time pains me to no end when I finally decide to stand up - hence the reason I have already shoveled my driveway twice...and some of the road just for shits and giggles. But seriously - most people - I would think - look forward to days of nothing. Why on earth do I have such a hard time with this?
Not sure I have the answer to this, but I have some potential reasons:
1- I have some strong case of overactivity - which I am defining as the act of doing things at all times for no apparent reason.
2- I feel lazy sitting around all day when this is CLEARLY what my body needs.
3- It makes me feel like my brother and that concerns me - even though I love him to death. His work ethic is questionable.
4- I'm addicted to hanging out.
And there you have it. Any chance I can get some opinions on this or at least someone to admit to having the same problem?
I hope so.
Enjoy the snow:)
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Would you Ever make a Lateral Move?
For my 100th post (eeek) I decided that I would ponder you all with a little bit of a hypothetical situation. It's going to be complicated to write about because in order to really get into my non-medical theories I would have to know your response to my question. But for shits and giggles I will just dive right in and hope for the best. So here goes...
Randomly today I asked a friend this simple question - If you could be any 'Average Joe/Jane' (man or woman...it doesn't matter) for one day...who would you be? His response is why we get along so well despite having so many differences. He said - "Me. I wouldn't want to be anyone else." And while that may sound like complete bullshit to most people it was truly enlightening because I would say the same thing. And then he said what an interesting question it was because 'who makes a lateral move?'
Which lead me to writing this blog. More often than not when people are asked - If you could be anyone in the world for a day, who would you be? They are going to name someone famous...someone who accomplished something tremendous and received a significant amount of recognition for it...you get the point. When asked that same question WITHOUT the money, fame, and whatever else those people have - it becomes a lot harder.
Here's why this is a trick question - in my non-medical opinion. If you give anyone but yourself as your answer - you are admitting - without knowing it - that you in fact do have some faults or things about yourself or your life that you wish were different. That doesn't mean you are wrong to think this - but you are also probably too lazy or afraid to change it. And instead of doing so, you will more often than not just continue to go about your daily life as if you are perfectly happy when deep down...you might want to be doing something different....or differently.
Just think about it. Let me know what your answer would be and I would imagine I would have more pseudo-clinical comments.
Until next time...goodnight.
Randomly today I asked a friend this simple question - If you could be any 'Average Joe/Jane' (man or woman...it doesn't matter) for one day...who would you be? His response is why we get along so well despite having so many differences. He said - "Me. I wouldn't want to be anyone else." And while that may sound like complete bullshit to most people it was truly enlightening because I would say the same thing. And then he said what an interesting question it was because 'who makes a lateral move?'
Which lead me to writing this blog. More often than not when people are asked - If you could be anyone in the world for a day, who would you be? They are going to name someone famous...someone who accomplished something tremendous and received a significant amount of recognition for it...you get the point. When asked that same question WITHOUT the money, fame, and whatever else those people have - it becomes a lot harder.
Here's why this is a trick question - in my non-medical opinion. If you give anyone but yourself as your answer - you are admitting - without knowing it - that you in fact do have some faults or things about yourself or your life that you wish were different. That doesn't mean you are wrong to think this - but you are also probably too lazy or afraid to change it. And instead of doing so, you will more often than not just continue to go about your daily life as if you are perfectly happy when deep down...you might want to be doing something different....or differently.
Just think about it. Let me know what your answer would be and I would imagine I would have more pseudo-clinical comments.
Until next time...goodnight.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Apparently Some Things are Just That Easy
A little while back...in the midst of probably another run-in with an appearingly normal guy who turned out to be a douche...I remember going over things over and over in my head. How can he go from wanting to hang out and chat all the time to no response? Was it something I said? Was it something that I did? Did I ask him to hang out with my friends too quickly? You name it - I thought about it.
No matter how often we tell ourselves that we shouldn't be so worried about things. That as long as we're being honest with ourselves everything should be all well and good - We always stray from this thought process. But why? I remember at that same instance that I was questioning all of those things about myself and what I could have done differently - I took a step back and said - Wait a second...what have I been telling myself over the past year? There is no reason why I can't be myself and he can't be himself and we can't just enjoy each other's company. Isn't that what a relationship should be?
"Samson Simpson! I stick by my story! If I wasn't Jamaican...then why would I wear this hat?" Okay sorry - I had to throw that quote in...it seemed like such a good fit.
Anyhow.. I'm gonna go ahead and stick by my original theory that two people can have a very successful relationship without altering their personalities entirely. It seems I have managed to do just that....so far. I remain hopeful and optimistic as always. See that...nothing's changed yet.
Best of luck to the rest of you. I hope you're happy just the way you are.
Gnight.
No matter how often we tell ourselves that we shouldn't be so worried about things. That as long as we're being honest with ourselves everything should be all well and good - We always stray from this thought process. But why? I remember at that same instance that I was questioning all of those things about myself and what I could have done differently - I took a step back and said - Wait a second...what have I been telling myself over the past year? There is no reason why I can't be myself and he can't be himself and we can't just enjoy each other's company. Isn't that what a relationship should be?
"Samson Simpson! I stick by my story! If I wasn't Jamaican...then why would I wear this hat?" Okay sorry - I had to throw that quote in...it seemed like such a good fit.
Anyhow.. I'm gonna go ahead and stick by my original theory that two people can have a very successful relationship without altering their personalities entirely. It seems I have managed to do just that....so far. I remain hopeful and optimistic as always. See that...nothing's changed yet.
Best of luck to the rest of you. I hope you're happy just the way you are.
Gnight.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Dazed and Confused
After a vacation in paradise, I am having trouble organizing my thoughts. Could it be the 4 days straight of hard drinking? More than likely yes. Could it be the culture shock coming back to the US and not having to have a sit down meeting with papers to get cases of beer (all in Spanish)? Possibly. Could it be the fact that I'm stuck back at work now instead of at the most beautiful villa having rap video style parties with minimal male nudity? Definitely.
In summary I would say that Cabo San Lucas is not only the most beautiful place on earth, but that La Roca villa at Misiones del Cabo is hands down heaven. Just pure heaven. However, this would not have been the heaven that it was had it not been for the 11 people I was so fortunate to have gone on vacation with. Who would have thought that 12 later 20 something's could all COMPLETELY get along for 5 days - even after Foxworth had 10 Dewars just on the plane ride down? It truly was amazing and I am just so thankful.
I now have endless stories, hundreds of pictures and several videos that will never go beyond our 12 sets of eyes - and for good reason. Even with all of that greatness that will clearly last a lifetime, I think the most important thing here is that I have amazing friends. While I have known most of them my entire life - and others have shown up along the way - it constantly amazes me that the good times just keep on coming. Every time we hang out it's pretty much better than the last and I just find that to be so bizarre and awesome at the same time.
Are other groups of friends this much fun? I sure hope so because sometimes I feel bad that I'm always having the best time. I probably shouldn't - you're right - but I do anyway. And after just 5 days with these people, I can honestly say that the reason that we all get along as well as we do is because we are just honest. Honest and genuinely nice people. Maybe that last part is a bit of an overstatement for some. Foxworth did start playing with the man's hair who was sitting in front of him on the plane. Come to find out it was not Monaco but a very confused Asian man. He was not happy. I digress.
And so I will leave you all with a ridiculous line that I have learned from my friend Monaco, but one that certainly holds true in this particular blog post: You do you.
Just think about that and have at it. I certainly did in Mexico :)
night night.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Seemingly Effortless
Not to step on the old 'Jump to Conclusions Mat' but we all know my track record with dating. Sub par to say the least. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing. It's given me so much in return - always skipping one of the more important things - but nevertheless has enhanced my ability to tell stories at a new level. And for that I am grateful.
But, if we are all keeping up here, I went out on what I considered a very successful...very pleasant...all-in-all a 'no complaints' date. And throughout the week there are the occasional texts but by Thursday there had been no plans to have a second date. So of course my first instinct is to think that this could be a 'friend' situation because I've known him for so long and we've never been more than friends so I went ahead and took the situation into my own hands - I asked him if he was doing anything over the weekend. Sure enough he wasn't and poof..we had plans for the next night.
So I got to pick the place...no questions asked...he loved the choice in fact. For the first time in my life I remembered something that someone said very casually and I used that to pick the perfect restaurant. I meet him at his place...we immediately play some Rockband because we're both obsessed. Turns out we make a great team - perfect. And then we head out to the restaurant.
Opens all the doors again. Very nice. Dinner was delicious. Great conversation. Laughing all the time...at the very least smiling the whole time. Then it was back to his place for more Rockband. Lots more Rockband. After something like 20 songs...maybe more...my back was ready to completely shatter. And then came the greatest back massage I have ever received...and willingly!!! It was amazing.
We then proceeded to watch Big Lebowski...hysterical. The Dude may be one of the funniest characters ever created. And I can't think of a better movie to put you in the mood...
But that I'll keep to myself. Just know that I haven't left a date with a bigger smile on my face in a very long time. I look forward to the third.
And herein lies my always churning mind - is it possible that things can be this easy? Nothing that can't be said, nothing that is over the line or inappropriate and we can completely be ourselves. Who knew?
Any reason for concern? Let me know your thoughts.
Enjoy the weekend...watch lots of football :)
But, if we are all keeping up here, I went out on what I considered a very successful...very pleasant...all-in-all a 'no complaints' date. And throughout the week there are the occasional texts but by Thursday there had been no plans to have a second date. So of course my first instinct is to think that this could be a 'friend' situation because I've known him for so long and we've never been more than friends so I went ahead and took the situation into my own hands - I asked him if he was doing anything over the weekend. Sure enough he wasn't and poof..we had plans for the next night.
So I got to pick the place...no questions asked...he loved the choice in fact. For the first time in my life I remembered something that someone said very casually and I used that to pick the perfect restaurant. I meet him at his place...we immediately play some Rockband because we're both obsessed. Turns out we make a great team - perfect. And then we head out to the restaurant.
Opens all the doors again. Very nice. Dinner was delicious. Great conversation. Laughing all the time...at the very least smiling the whole time. Then it was back to his place for more Rockband. Lots more Rockband. After something like 20 songs...maybe more...my back was ready to completely shatter. And then came the greatest back massage I have ever received...and willingly!!! It was amazing.
We then proceeded to watch Big Lebowski...hysterical. The Dude may be one of the funniest characters ever created. And I can't think of a better movie to put you in the mood...
But that I'll keep to myself. Just know that I haven't left a date with a bigger smile on my face in a very long time. I look forward to the third.
And herein lies my always churning mind - is it possible that things can be this easy? Nothing that can't be said, nothing that is over the line or inappropriate and we can completely be ourselves. Who knew?
Any reason for concern? Let me know your thoughts.
Enjoy the weekend...watch lots of football :)
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Pretty Much No Rhythm
After spending a great deal of time with adults aged 35-50...up to 60 even..I have come to a couple of conclusions that I would like to share. Maybe they are more questions than conclusions...but regardless....
Where the hell was all of the rhythm in the 50s and 60s? Was finger snapping and swaying side to side the only options in terms of dancing because I can't quite figure out what all of our parents are doing on the dance floor these days and it hit me today that this might be something to concern myself with. In all seriousness though - they had all of the great music: Beatles, Tommy James and the Shondells (one of my favorites), and then growing up with even more of the greats - Zeppelin, Floyd, The Who, Talking Heads...I mean I am not going to list of my parents favorite bands. All of these bands could rock the hell out...what on earth were our parents doing when this was happening?
Smoking pot? Doing other mindless drugs that made them numb to the joys of dancing like there is no tomorrow? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say yes because there is just no other explanation for this.
If you look at people today in their mid-late 20s/early 30s...they can all dance for the most part. Sure...some better than others. We all know Leeann is a phenomenal dancer (I can say that because she doesn't read this)...but in all honesty, I can't name any parents.. other than maybe the Monaco's and the Stapleton's who can...as a pair... really tear up a rug. Why is this?
Please throw me some insights because I'm very curious. And let's help these poor souls out. Sure... I enjoy a hard snap from here to there but the crooked tilting and general awkwardness has got to go.
I love you anyway Mom!
Can't wait to hear your thoughts...all of you!
Goodnight.
Where the hell was all of the rhythm in the 50s and 60s? Was finger snapping and swaying side to side the only options in terms of dancing because I can't quite figure out what all of our parents are doing on the dance floor these days and it hit me today that this might be something to concern myself with. In all seriousness though - they had all of the great music: Beatles, Tommy James and the Shondells (one of my favorites), and then growing up with even more of the greats - Zeppelin, Floyd, The Who, Talking Heads...I mean I am not going to list of my parents favorite bands. All of these bands could rock the hell out...what on earth were our parents doing when this was happening?
Smoking pot? Doing other mindless drugs that made them numb to the joys of dancing like there is no tomorrow? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say yes because there is just no other explanation for this.
If you look at people today in their mid-late 20s/early 30s...they can all dance for the most part. Sure...some better than others. We all know Leeann is a phenomenal dancer (I can say that because she doesn't read this)...but in all honesty, I can't name any parents.. other than maybe the Monaco's and the Stapleton's who can...as a pair... really tear up a rug. Why is this?
Please throw me some insights because I'm very curious. And let's help these poor souls out. Sure... I enjoy a hard snap from here to there but the crooked tilting and general awkwardness has got to go.
I love you anyway Mom!
Can't wait to hear your thoughts...all of you!
Goodnight.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Too Much Time to Think
As I sit here in my bed...my newly decorated bed complete with duvet cover and matching European shams from Anthropologie...I can't help but think about a couple of things:
1. I have been watching too much TV.
2. Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead is still a fantastic movie.
3. I never EVER think about things as much as I have over the past couple of days and it's starting to bug me.
And this brings me to tonight's topic. While I'm assuming that there are a lot of people out there who have had the kind of dating experiences that I have....sans the 'Slayer' incident...I often find myself very intrigued by how two people can look at the same situation differently. Particularly two people of the opposite sex. Now everyone knows that men and women think about things differently. Quite differently at times. But if I learned one thing during my 2009 casual relations extravaganza it was that there are times when men think about things the way that I woman usually thinks about things - thus causing that woman to be quite frustrated. I'm sure the opposite happens with a man because more often than not the woman is over-analyzing every single minute detail of everything you could possibly imagine - thus causing a man to want to rip all of his hair out...or just never call her. Either way, the end result is usually not good.
Why do we all do this? What are we all worried about? Is it possible that every one of us is insecure to the point of exhaustion? Do we all have no confidence in our redeeming qualities that we spend every waking hour of the day wondering if the person we are even mildly interested in is thinking about asking us out...or just hanging out?
I was certainly guilty of this up until a certain point in my life, but I have to tell ya - as I have regained my independence and continue to work on any issues of self-confidence that have plagued me over the years I have to say...it is SO MUCH easier to just not worry about all of this. I know that's easier said than done, but take my non-medical advice and just worry about yourself. What makes you happy and what can you do to just be a better person overall...these are the types of things you should be occupying your brain power with.
There is one other solution to these issues and that is to not have so much down time in your life. My god. I haven't thought about anything as much as I have over the past couple of weeks because I haven't been at work and this has just opened up the flood gates. I feel like I did in 2006 again and I'm not digging it. I'm back in that questioning mode where I wonder what's going on in the other person's head and I haven't thought about that in the longest time. It's awful. So what am I going to do about it? This is I'm sure what you're asking yourself right now. I'm going to just stop. All together. And would you look at that...I feel better already.
As we enter into what will hopefully be a fantastic year for you all, I'm interested in hearing what's plaguing your thoughts these days. I would put money on it not having much to do with what's best for you. But I hope I'm wrong.
Have a good one.
1. I have been watching too much TV.
2. Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead is still a fantastic movie.
3. I never EVER think about things as much as I have over the past couple of days and it's starting to bug me.
And this brings me to tonight's topic. While I'm assuming that there are a lot of people out there who have had the kind of dating experiences that I have....sans the 'Slayer' incident...I often find myself very intrigued by how two people can look at the same situation differently. Particularly two people of the opposite sex. Now everyone knows that men and women think about things differently. Quite differently at times. But if I learned one thing during my 2009 casual relations extravaganza it was that there are times when men think about things the way that I woman usually thinks about things - thus causing that woman to be quite frustrated. I'm sure the opposite happens with a man because more often than not the woman is over-analyzing every single minute detail of everything you could possibly imagine - thus causing a man to want to rip all of his hair out...or just never call her. Either way, the end result is usually not good.
Why do we all do this? What are we all worried about? Is it possible that every one of us is insecure to the point of exhaustion? Do we all have no confidence in our redeeming qualities that we spend every waking hour of the day wondering if the person we are even mildly interested in is thinking about asking us out...or just hanging out?
I was certainly guilty of this up until a certain point in my life, but I have to tell ya - as I have regained my independence and continue to work on any issues of self-confidence that have plagued me over the years I have to say...it is SO MUCH easier to just not worry about all of this. I know that's easier said than done, but take my non-medical advice and just worry about yourself. What makes you happy and what can you do to just be a better person overall...these are the types of things you should be occupying your brain power with.
There is one other solution to these issues and that is to not have so much down time in your life. My god. I haven't thought about anything as much as I have over the past couple of weeks because I haven't been at work and this has just opened up the flood gates. I feel like I did in 2006 again and I'm not digging it. I'm back in that questioning mode where I wonder what's going on in the other person's head and I haven't thought about that in the longest time. It's awful. So what am I going to do about it? This is I'm sure what you're asking yourself right now. I'm going to just stop. All together. And would you look at that...I feel better already.
As we enter into what will hopefully be a fantastic year for you all, I'm interested in hearing what's plaguing your thoughts these days. I would put money on it not having much to do with what's best for you. But I hope I'm wrong.
Have a good one.
Friday, January 1, 2010
2010 Resolutions...For the Hell of It
After ringing in the New Year with what is probably the coolest family of all time, I am feeling obligated to write out a couple of the resolutions I have set aside for myself in 2010. Not that these are of any particular interest to my readers, but maybe this will inspire all of you to take a good look at yourselves and see if there is anything you would truly like to change/alter slightly about yourself in the upcoming year.
This goes without saying that I am of the opinion that we should all constantly be looking at ways to better ourselves and should not wait for the changing of the calendar in order to do so. Knowing that that's just me living in my very own LaLa Land...I will move on.
Real quick, I would like to highlight some of the things that made 2009 the best year of my life (and these are in no particular order):
1. Erin is finally single and doing whatever the hell she wants with her time.
2. Booking the Salt Creek Grille for Donna B's big surprise party.
3. Worst trip ever to Mont Tremblant, Canada with my brother - and not because I went with my brother.
4. Blind dates from hell.
5. St. Patty's Day party embarrassment.
6. BBQs, Quality hang out time, beach...you get the picture.
7. The Keller Wedding
8. Karaoke after the Keller wedding
8. Olson's Best Man speech
9. Dominique's wedding
10. The after party for Dominique's wedding
11. LIVE BAND KARAOKE
12. Nicole's wedding
13. Visiting Chicago
14. Being single
15. Donna's actual party
16. PPI happy hours and shennanigans
17. Any incident of flip cup at Olson's
18. Planned trip to Cabo
19. Cruise in 2010!
And the list goes on and on. Please do not take offense if I didn't mention everything awesome that happened this past year. It's too much to remember.
In closing, I would like to give you a couple of things that I plan to work on in 2010 in the hopes that this year can be even half as good as last year. Here's hoping!
1. Pay off credit card debt - mandatory
2. Exercise more
3. Eat less
4. Spend more time writing....and reading.
5. Pay off credit card debt.
And there you have it. Cheers to a fantastic 2010!
This goes without saying that I am of the opinion that we should all constantly be looking at ways to better ourselves and should not wait for the changing of the calendar in order to do so. Knowing that that's just me living in my very own LaLa Land...I will move on.
Real quick, I would like to highlight some of the things that made 2009 the best year of my life (and these are in no particular order):
1. Erin is finally single and doing whatever the hell she wants with her time.
2. Booking the Salt Creek Grille for Donna B's big surprise party.
3. Worst trip ever to Mont Tremblant, Canada with my brother - and not because I went with my brother.
4. Blind dates from hell.
5. St. Patty's Day party embarrassment.
6. BBQs, Quality hang out time, beach...you get the picture.
7. The Keller Wedding
8. Karaoke after the Keller wedding
8. Olson's Best Man speech
9. Dominique's wedding
10. The after party for Dominique's wedding
11. LIVE BAND KARAOKE
12. Nicole's wedding
13. Visiting Chicago
14. Being single
15. Donna's actual party
16. PPI happy hours and shennanigans
17. Any incident of flip cup at Olson's
18. Planned trip to Cabo
19. Cruise in 2010!
And the list goes on and on. Please do not take offense if I didn't mention everything awesome that happened this past year. It's too much to remember.
In closing, I would like to give you a couple of things that I plan to work on in 2010 in the hopes that this year can be even half as good as last year. Here's hoping!
1. Pay off credit card debt - mandatory
2. Exercise more
3. Eat less
4. Spend more time writing....and reading.
5. Pay off credit card debt.
And there you have it. Cheers to a fantastic 2010!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
